NASCAR star Tony Stewart said this week he was willing to be "available" to Kevin Ward's family even though he doesn't need to speak to them in order to achieve "closure" in the dirt-track incident that killed the 20-year-old last month.
The usually hotheaded Stewart was subdued during a 30-minute question-and-answer session with journalists at the headquarters of Stewart-Haas Racing in Kannapolis, North Carolina.
"I want to be available to them if they want to talk about it," Stewart said of Ward's family. "At this point, I don't need to talk to them for closure. I know what happened, and I know it was an accident, but I'm offering to talk to them to help them, if it helps them with closure."
Stewart, 43, one of the biggest names in auto racing, hit and killed Ward, 20, during a non-NASCAR sprint-car race on Aug. 9 at the Canandaigua Motorsports Park track.
Stewart and Ward bumped cars during the race and the collision sent Ward into an outside retaining wall while Stewart remained in the race.
Ward jumped from his car in an attempt to confront Stewart during the caution period. When Stewart's car came around the next lap, Ward pointed at Stewart. As Stewart reached Ward, his car seemed to swerve, hitting Ward and throwing him 50 feet.
The session marked the first time the former NASCAR champion spoke publicly since a grand jury in New York state on Wednesday decided to bring no charges against him stemming from Ward's death.
Stewart said he felt relieved not to face charges.
"I would be lying if I said there wasn't a piece of relief, but that was very short-lived. Because as quickly as it was relief in my heart, it went right back to the fact that we lost Kevin. We lost a young driver that had a lot of talent," the driver added.
Stewart said that he now wishes he never took part in the race and the incident has "changed" him.
"Before the accident happened, a day would fly by," said Stewart. "And now, a day seems like two or three days. It feels like the batteries are running low on the clock. I honestly think that every day it will get better, it will get easier. I don't know if it will ever be normal again."
Toxicology reports showed that Ward had been under the influence of marijuana during the incident.
The report didn't change anything in Stewart's mind though.
"To me a young driver lost his life," he said. "Didn't matter why or what was going on. The end result was the same. No matter what was said, it was still a tragic accident. I just know in my heart that it was a hundred percent an accident."
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